Comments from the Peanut Gallery

Taking one day at a time...

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  • Friday, June 30, 2006

    Arriving At Gate 60634...

    My Sister is coming in town for the weekend! I'm so excited! I get to see her and her Hubby and Bro and Bubba. The Princess has to stay behind to work and watch the dogs and the house, so I won't be able to see her this time. It'll be so nice to see them again. I know they've already left their house and it's a long drive from Kansas, but if I don't get to see them tonight, I'll definitely get to see them for sure tomorrow. It is sure to be a jam-packed, fun-filled weekend.

    Taste of Chicago starts today, so I'm sure Bro will be eating his way through Chicago's finest food domains. Baby Jack will get to play with his cousin, Bubba, too. And I get to pick My Sister's brain on the trials and tribulations of raising a toddler with an infant (that's what the crazy women in my family do, you know; we all have babies back-to-back!). I wish the weekend could last so much longer!

    You can bet your life I'll be taking many, many pictures and boosting the sales of Duracell in the process. I just know it'll be difficult to pick which ones to post here later. I'll do my best, no doubt.

    I'll try to post regularly over the next few days, probably in the mornings or naptimes, if possible. It'll be hot as hell here, so maybe I'll bust out the kiddie pool for Baby Jack and Bubba. We will be keep the AC on, not just because of the heat, but because of the loud fireworks this neighborhood creates. Plus, the AC cuts down on how much the dogs will freak out because of the noise. (The dogs also know what happens to them if they wake the babies. Heh...)

    Have a safe holiday weekend!

    Thursday, June 29, 2006

    Emergency Fuel...

    A couple weeks ago, I bought a few great books about feeding toddlers. Baby Jack isn't as picky as other toddlers I've known, but he has his days (like all toddlers do). I've been perusing them at my leisure (whenever the babies are napping or asleep for the night). They came with wonderful recipes, charts and percentages of daily vitamin and mineral requirements and which foods are rich in each, and information about how to give Baby Jack all the nutrients he needs. However, if I weren't so tired from running around after him, keeping him out of no-touch areas (like the dog bowls, the lamp cords, the glass on all the windows, etc.), cleaning up after him (mealtimes and nooks where he throws his toys...that means everywhere), and taking care of Baby Liv (nursing on demand, frequent diaper changes, pretty much nonstop holding, etc.), I'd be able to throw together these "easy" recipes.

    These "easy" recipes require that you have a completely obedient, self-reliant toddler who gets into no trouble at all and never throws tantrums. They also require that you don't have to take care of said toddler's younger sibling at the same time (so that you can cook something whimsical). These "easy" recipes require you to have your fridge and pantry stocked with "common" things you buy at the grocery store such as kale, pine nuts, nut butters, liver, tofu, quinoa, ricotta cheese, wheat germ, edamame...You get the picture. I don't have any of that shit in my fridge or pantry. Okay...I do have the edamame, which I really do buy regularly, but I'm the only one who eats it! I love it (in the shell), but Baby Jack does not. He's tried it, but scoffs any of my futile attempts to get him to like it regularly. He does, however, love his soy milk.

    Yeah...I could whip up any of these "easy" recipes if I chose to not buy my regular items each week like ice cream, chocolate mint Oreos, and Eight O'Clock bean coffee. Okay, these are sorry-ass staples in my diet, but they work and sometimes they keep me going. These aren't the only things I eat, of course. I eat pretty well, as a matter of fact. However, these items have become emergency fuel for me lately.

    Coffee is a shitty breakfast, but it's necessary when I know I'm going to be running around chasing a kid who's pulling the lamp on top of himself daily. Don't worry. I always drink several liters of water each day because I like it and because I need it. It's not coffee-coffee-coffee all day long, believe me. My bowels would reject me and so would my breastfed baby. I only drink enough to wake my ass up, but I have to have it. Oreos are a wonderful substitution for a real dinner, especially when I have to feed both babies at the same time. It's not easy to nurse a baby at the same time I'm trying to cajole a toddler into eating whatever it is I'm serving him that he, of course, is refusing and throwing at me, the walls, and the dog. I usually eat whatever he doesn't want if I can't make a plate for myself. Ice cream is my reward at the end of the day after both babies have been put to sleep. I can enjoy it just long enough before Baby Liv decides she doesn't want to sleep anymore and wants to nurse even though I've nursed her for a half-hour before she went to sleep and she's only been sleeping twenty minutes.

    Yeah...these were great books with lots of information; I only wish most of the recipes in the back were more practical. I might try some of those recipes, but I think I'll rely primarily on Mother's Intuition when it comes to feeding my kid; I know what he needs and what he gets and what he likes. I'm not stupid. I just might have another way to use those books, fucking coasters for the beer that will one day take the place of that ice cream!

    Wednesday, June 28, 2006

    I Learned A Few New Things...

    I read a great article yesterday and I learned several things I didn't know before about infant growth and development. The article was written by Mary Howard, RN, and was found here . It's worth a read if you've got youngsters in your house. Here are just a few highlights I found fascinating:

    1. At 2 weeks, a baby should be back to birth weight.
    2. Weight usually doubles by 4-7 months and height increases by 1 inch. (Notice that is a big variable and still the average.)
    3. Birth weight may triple by 14-17 months and quadruple by age 2 to 3 years.
    4. This is 3 years height is approximately 50% of eventual adult height.
    5. Birth length may double by age 4, and triple by age 13.
    6. On average, there is a 4 to 7 pound weight gain a year from age 2 to age 13.
    7. Then, during puberty, for girls of 10-14 years old, a gain of 15 to 55 pounds and an increase of 2 to 10 inches. (You talk about a wide variable! and that is an average!). About 95% of mature height is achieved by onset of Menarche.
    8. Boys age 11-16 have a weight gain of 15 to 65 lbs and a height increase of 4 to 12 inches. Height is about 95% of mature height by age 15. This is an average and often times some children reach their mature height before this time and some 2-3 years after this time and still be considered within the normal trends.

    I just thought I'd share this with you. Every child is different, though. For example, my son didn't double his birth weight until he was four months old, but my daughter did it by the time she was two months old. It just goes to show you..."normal" is a very wide range.

    Tuesday, June 27, 2006

    Things That Make Me Happy Today...

    It's so easy to bitch about things, so I won't. Instead, I'll post about five things that I'm very happy about right now. Here goes:

    1. It just dawned on me that I still haven't had a period since Baby Liv was born on April 8th. Thank goodness for breastfeeding (or at least I hope that's the reason)!

    2. I absolutely can't wait to go on vacation. I belong in the Northwoods, you know. And we're taking my Dad with us this year. He deserves it after all he does for us.

    3. My Sister and most of her family are coming up this weekend from Kansas and I can't wait to see her! I miss her so much.

    4. Baby Jack slept almost thirteen hours last night! And Baby Liv slept for about seven hours before she needed to nurse! I must be doing something right. Either that, or they're both just growing like weeds right now.

    5. I think I get a paycheck this Friday, but I'm not sure if it's this week or next. Either way, I get a freaking paycheck soon, first time in a long time.

    I hope the rest of today goes as well as it's started out. The day, however, is still young, but I'm hopeful.

    Now, it's your turn. What are you happy about today?

    Monday, June 26, 2006


    In pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic

    For example, the trade name of Tylenol also has a generic name of
    acetaminophen. Aleve is also called naproxen. Amoxil is also called
    amoxicillin and Advil is also called ibuprofen.

    The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra. After careful
    consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced
    that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin.

    Also considered were Mycoxafailin, Mydixadrupin, Mydixarizin, Dixafix,
    and of course, Ibepokin.

    Pfizer Corporation announced today that Viagra will soon be available in
    liquid form, and will be marketed by Pepsi-Cola as a power beverage
    suitable for use as a mixer. It will now be possible for a man to
    literally pour himself a stiff one. Obviously we can no longer call
    this a "soft" drink, and it gives new meaning to the names of "cocktails,"
    "highballs," and just a good old-fashioned "stiff drink". Pepsi will
    market the new concoction by the name of: MOUNT & DO.

    Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants
    and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040,
    there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge
    erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.


    Sunday, June 25, 2006

    As If You Didn't See Enough... of my kids, that is.
    Baby Jack is playing "Hide and Seek" here. If he closes his eyes, you can't see him, you know.

    Baby Liv and her "Buddha Belly." She's learning to love the camera, especially because I'm shoving it in her face every single day. Heh...

    By the way, this isn't the last you'll see of them (as if you thought it was). At the rate I'm taking pictures, you'll be seeing them grow as much as I am!

    Have a happy Sunday!

    Saturday, June 24, 2006

    Have You Ever Been This Tired?...

    This is not my kid.
    I repeat, this is not my kid. I would never let that happen, but I think it's hilarious; I probably shouldn't, though. Heh...

    Friday, June 23, 2006

    Farewell... dear unpaid maternity leave, that is. Hello, paychecks!

    I went downtown to reinstate myself back to work for this coming school year. Fortunately, two of the perks of being a teacher is that I have all summer off and I still get paid. And one of the benefits of having Baby Liv later in this past school year (April 2006) is that I've had less unpaid time off than I did when Baby Jack was born last February (2005).

    Getting there was quite a hassle because Prick Cheney is in town and traffic was a nightmare on the expressway and downtown. Certain entrances and exits were closed for him, as were the express lanes going there. I'm glad it's over and we're all home. Hubby drove me with the kids in the car. It took me almost an hour to complete the process. Baby Liv slept the entire time and is still sleeping as I write this. Baby Jack, however, is fighting his nap and he was really fussy in the car because of his teething. I'm happy we're all home, safe and sound, and life can resume its normalcy.

    Now that summer is here and school is out, I'll be getting paychecks again. Whew! I'm really looking forward to that. I'm not, however, looking forward to going back to work in the fall. I really need to start playing the lottery. Heh...

    Thursday, June 22, 2006

    Oh. My. God...

    This was sent to me in an email from my niece, Blondie...

    She thought it was worthy of a blog post! Heh...

    (Click on the picture, then click on the lower right hand corner to see it closer.)

    Any comments?

    Wednesday, June 21, 2006

    Their Eyes Tell A Story...

    Here are some recent pictures of my babies...

    Baby Liv looks so much like her Papa.

    Can you see all those teeth Baby Jack has popping through on the bottom?

    Baby Liv's eyes sparkle like the stars. They're still blue, but I think they'll turn into the same color as her brother's.

    Baby Jack can give a very serious look when he wants to. You can't tell from this picture, but his eyes are a deep dark green/hazel. They are truly beautiful.

    I sure make some pretty babies. It runs in the family, you know. Heh...

    Tuesday, June 20, 2006

    To Be Six Again...

    A man was sitting on the edge of the bed, observing his wife turning
    back and forth, looking at herself in the mirror. Since her birthday
    was not far off, he asked what she'd like to have for her birthday.

    I'd like to be six again, she replied, still looking in the mirror. On
    the morning of her birthday, he arose early, made her a nice big bowl
    of Lucky Charms, and then took her to Six Flags theme park. What a
    day! He put her on every ride in the park; the Death Slide, the Wall of
    Fear, the Screaming Monster Roller Coaster... everything there was.

    Five hours Later they staggered out of the theme park. Her head was
    reeling and her stomach felt upside down. He then took her to a
    McDonald's where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a
    chocolate shake. Then it was off to a movie, popcorn, a soda pop, and
    her favorite candy, M&M's. What a fabulous adventure!

    Finally she wobbled home with her husband and collapsed into bed
    exhausted. He leaned over his wife with a big smile and lovingly asked,
    Well, Dear, what was it like being six again??

    Her eyes slowly opened and her expression suddenly changed. I meant my DRESS SIZE!

    The moral of the story: Even when a man is listening, he is going to
    get it wrong!

    Monday, June 19, 2006

    Look Closely...

    I can't believe what I'm seeing, but I know it's real. She IS this stupid.

    You MUST see this.

    Is Britney's eight-month-old baby sunburned? In the shape of a "wife beater" T-shirt a la KFed? Shame on her.

    Someone really should tie her tubes. Really tight. Several times. For the sake of the rest of the world.

    Sunday, June 18, 2006

    Happy Father's Day!

    Four important things today:

    1. Check out Hubby's Father's Day present! You truly are The Best, my love!

    2. And an equally wonderful present is what calmed down Baby least for a little while.

    3. One more thing...I love my Dad...for who he is to my family, for who he has become, and for all that he does for us. I couldn't ask for a better father.

    4. I truly love these men with all of my heart!

    Saturday, June 17, 2006

    I Am Truly Not Alone...

    I want to thank all my fellow bloggers for commenting on my last post with their experiences. It helps to know I'm not alone and that mothers all over the country have shared my dilemma.

    Yesterday, however, was no better than I expected. Hubby was off from work and was so worn out by both kids (Baby Jack runs circles around both of us and Baby Liv is so very needy). I think it was a little more than he expected and he truly sees what I've been going through this past week. You see, by the time he gets home from work, both kids are sleeping and the house is tidy and it looks like everything's been great all day long. Each day, however, is a struggle. Some days are better than others, though.

    I do feel less guilty about letting Baby Liv cry a little. With Baby Jack, I couldn't let him cry. He was my first and it broke my heart to hear it, so he was always in my arms, day and night. I co-slept with him and I currently do it with her, too. I strongly believe in it. Children will let you know, in their own way, when they need their own bed and their own space.

    Baby Liv hates the swing, for now. Baby Jack didn't like it until he was about five months old, I think. I'd wear her in my Snugli all the time if it weren't so damn hot. She did, however, sleep in my arms while Hubby vacuumed right next to her ear yesterday. How she did that, I'll never know.

    Last night, she slept for about six hours straight before she needed to nurse. I was grateful. Baby Jack, however, woke up from his teething pain in the middle of the night, but was easily soothed by his Mama's arms and the rocking chair. He's got all four molars poking through and one of his lower canines. I'm waiting for the other three to pop through, which should be any day now.

    Thanks, again, for taking the time to post what worked and didn't work for you. I feel better knowing that I'm not alone. This, too, shall pass, I'm sure. One way or another, something will work...eventually.

    Friday, June 16, 2006

    A Little Over One Year Ago, A Nearly Identical Dilemma Today...

    I posted this last year on May 2, 2005 and I swear it applies to me today, as well. The only things that change are the baby's name and the "Mommy Bounce" is now called the "Mommy Sway" (yeah...we learned our lesson the first time since it killed my knees and hips).

    Baby Liv just won't let me put her down at all to sleep, even when I hold her until she's asleep and try to put her down. I can't stand it anymore. I love my little girl, but she needs to sleep anywhere other than my arms all the time. A part of me wants to be mean and vicious and just let her cry. And I have, both when Baby Jack's been awake and when he's been asleep. The only problem is that instead of soothing herself to sleep, she gets even louder! And I can't have her waking up Baby Jack from his nap or risk having the neighbors think I'm scalding her with hot water (believe me, if you heard her cry, you'd think I was torturing her). Baby Jack is cutting eight frickin' teeth at once and he needs his rest. So, I'm caught in a neverending cycle. When does a baby have the ability to soothe herself to sleep? I can't get a break.

    I've tried everything, and I mean everything. Nothing works...

    A) Breastfeeding will put her to sleep, but she gulps in air when she cries or is viciously attacking my nipples for comfort. This results in gas, which she is frightened by; she screams every time she farts while she is tired or asleep. Mylicon doesn't work anymore. Burping her takes eons for one tiny little bubble. Bottom line: she hates farting. I thought that as soon as she got bigger, she'd sleep better. Wrong.

    B) The nummy soothes her...until it falls out. Then it becomes Scream Central around here.

    C) I try to lie down with her and that works...until I leave the room. She's got Mommy Radar and knows when I'm peeing.

    D) I'm careful with my diet, so I don't think it has anything to do with that. And I don't really think she's colicky. I think she just prefers to be held all the time, like Baby Jack did.

    She. Only. Sleeps. In. My. Arms. And I would like my arms back. I'm trying to learn from the past (what did and did not work with Baby Jack). However, he was a horrible sleeper and didn't become better until he was over a year old. I can't go through that again or I'll start base jumping without a parachute for fun.

    So, I ask you, Gentle Readers...WTF do I do now? I feel my sanity slipping away, one tear at a time (hers AND mine). What worked/works for you? And don't give me some bullshit about how my baby just loves me and wants to be near me because I'm so flippin' wonderful. I'm searching for real answers because I'm running out of options. The past two days have been a nightmare. I'm wondering if it was her vaccines on Monday. I doubt it because she's been given Tylenol when her episodes were at their worst. Nothing knocks this kid out except my arms, with or without the vaccines. HELP!

    Thursday, June 15, 2006

    I Totally Get It Now...

    I found this on one of my favorite blogs. Nu received this in an email from her mother on Mother's Day. It's a poem by an unknown author titled, "Mean Moms," I think. It's worth a read, especially if you're a mother (or if you've ever had one you disagreed with as a teenager!). This post is just a general one, not meant for anyone in particular. It just struck a chord in me and I wanted to share it with you. I'm sure we can all relate to it on many different levels. Read on.

    "Someday when my children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will tell them, as my Mean Mom told me:

    I loved you enough . . . to ask where you were going, with whom, and what time you would be home.
    I loved you enough to be silent and let you discover that your new best friend was a creep.
    I loved you enough to make you go pay for the bubble gum you had taken and tell the clerk, "I stole this yesterday and want to pay for it."
    I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours while you cleaned your room, a job that should have taken 15 minutes.
    I loved you enough to let you see anger, disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children must learn that their parents aren't perfect.
    I loved you enough to let you assume the responsibility for your actions even when the penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.
    But most of all, I loved you enough . . . to say NO when I knew you would hate me for it.

    Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'm glad I won them, because in the end you won, too. And someday when your children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.

    Was your Mom mean? I know mine was. We had the meanest mother in the whole world! While other kids ate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal, eggs, and toast. When others had a Pepsi and a Twinkie for lunch, we had
    to eat sandwiches.
    And you can guess our mother fixed us a dinner that was different from what other kids had, too.

    Mother insisted on knowing where we were at all times. You'd think we were convicts in a prison. She had to know who our friends were, and what we were doing with them. She insisted that if we said we would be gone for an hour, we would be gone for an hour or less.

    We were ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerve to break the Child Labor Laws by making us work. We had to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn to cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trash and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lie awake at night thinking of more things for us to do.

    She always insisted on us telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time we were teenagers, she could read our minds and had eyes in the back of her head. Then, life was really tough!

    Mother wouldn't let our friends just honk the horn when they drove up. They had to come up to the door so she could meet them. While everyone else could date when they were 12 or 13, we had to wait until we were 16.

    Because of our mother we missed out on lots of things other kids experienced. None of us have ever been caught shoplifting, vandalizing other's property or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her fault.

    Now that we have left home, we are all educated, honest adults. We are doing our best to be mean parents just like Mom was.

    I think that is what's wrong with the world today. It just doesn't have enough mean moms!"

    Wednesday, June 14, 2006

    Unavoidable Laws...

    These are the unavoidable laws of the natural universe...

    1. Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease your nose will begin to itch or you'll have to pee.

    2. Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least
    accessible corner.

    3. Law of probability: The probability of being watched is directly
    proportional to the stupidity of your act.

    4. Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get a
    busy signal.

    5. Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work
    because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat

    6. Variation Law: If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you
    were in will start to move faster than the one you are in now (works
    every time).

    7. Bath Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the
    telephone rings.

    8. Law of Close Encounters: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

    9. Law of the Result: When you try to prove to someone that a machine
    won't work, it will.

    10. Law of Biomechanics: The severity of the itch is inversely
    proportional to the reach.

    11. Theater Rule: At any event, the people whose seats are furthest
    from the aisle arrive last.

    12. Law of Coffee: As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your
    boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is

    13. Murphy's Law of Lockers: If there are only two people in a locker
    room, they will have adjacent lockers.

    14. Law of Dirty Rugs/Carpets: The chances of an open-faced jelly
    sandwich landing face down on a floor covering are directly
    correlated to the newness, color, and cost of the carpet/rug.

    15. Law of Location: No matter where you go, there you are.

    16. Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know
    what you are talking about.

    17. Brown's Law: If the shoe fits, it's ugly.

    18. Oliver's Law: A closed mouth gathers no feet.

    19. Wilson's Law: As soon as you find a product that you really like,
    they will stop making it.

    Care to add any or share which ones you encounter regularly? Mine is #6. Yeesh.

    Tuesday, June 13, 2006

    A Gross Miscalculation...

    ...on my part, regarding our son's teething.

    Baby Jack isn't just getting all four of his first molars at once. He's also getting his canines, as well. This boy is miserable. You can see it in his eyes.

    I felt his gums last night and was astounded to see his lower canines were about to pop through. My poor little guy! At least, when all of this is over, he won't be going through it again for a little while. He'll need the break. Life isn't all about pain, you know.

    As for Baby Liv, she's handling her shots pretty well, so far. Both babies are living on Tylenol for the time being because of their pains.

    Boy, my Dad picked a great time to go on vacation! By the time he gets back, Baby Jack will have all of his teeth and Baby Liv's legs won't hurt from her multiple shots anymore.

    Yeesh...I need a vacation. Heh...

    Monday, June 12, 2006

    She Did It In Half The Time!...

    Baby Liv's doctor visit went very well. Other than the forty-five minute wait to get into a room and the horrid look on Liv's face when she received each of her four shots, it wasn't bad. They even gave her some Tylenol because I requested it. (I would've given it to her at home before we went there, but I didn't know the correct dosage.) Here are the stats you've been waiting for:

    Height: 22" (she grew two inches in one month)
    Weight: 11 pounds, 4 ounces (last month, she was 8 pounds, 2 ounces; she's doubled her birthweight already, at two months old, something Baby Jack didn't do until he was almost four months old!)
    Head Circumference: 15" (her head grew one whole inch)

    My Baby Liv is one big Butterball turkey! And she's so very different from her big brother, Jack.

    Say it with me,..."Hooray for Mama milk! Hooray for Baby Liv!"

    Sunday, June 11, 2006

    Cross Your Fingers...

    ...for two things:

    A) Baby Liv has her two-month check-up tomorrow afternoon at 4pm. Let's hope she does well for and after her four shots!

    B) Baby Jack has a new love...vanilla flavored soy milk. Let's hope he keeps drinking it! Finally...a milk he'll actually drink!

    I'll post tomorrow after the doctor's appointment. I'm so anxious to see how chubby my exclusively breastfed (insert pat on back for Mama) baby has become. I'm going to guess pretty damn close to (if not more than) eleven pounds. I know she's doubled her birthweight by now, my little Butterball!

    Hooray for Mama milk and vanilla flavored soy milk!

    Saturday, June 10, 2006

    On My Mind...

    *Baby Liv will have her two-month check-up late Monday afternoon. She'll get four shots, too (two in each thigh). Not. Looking. Forward. To. It.

    *Baby Jack has had a language explosion somewhat. He said, "No," the other day when I offered him a drink from his sippy cup and has said it a few more times since then. So far, he's not using it excessively, but I know that time is coming soon. He calls his cousin Blondie, "DeetDee," which is pretty close to her real name. He also tries to say certain words in the books we read to him. He's also said, "Hi," and "Bye," but not routinely. He's still trying to get the hang of how to use them. I love hearing his little voice.

    *Hubby will be going back to managing his original store (in addition to being operations manager for the chain), I believe, next week. It'll mean more in bonus pay, since that particular store does more business. Yea!

    *Hubby and I are also considering a possible timeframe for him to have his much-needed back surgery. The company will work out a pay arrangement for him during his recovery so he doesn't lose income. This is a surprise to me. Wrinkles need to be ironed out on this. Surgery is his only alternative, so we have to figure this all out. I'll be back at work in the fall, so he'll definitely need help with the kids (if he can even take care of them). It's all still up in the air and nothing concrete has been decided yet.

    *I am currently addicted to McDonald's Asian Chicken Salad, especially the edamame in it.

    *My Dad and my Father-In-Law are on a fishing vacation right now. I hope they both behave and don't argue. So far, they're having a blast. Keep your fingers crossed!

    *It's rainy and 55 degrees here in Chicago today. My Sister lives in Kansas and it's 40 degrees hotter.

    *I took a few pictures of Baby Liv smiling today and posted them below. They made my day. Did they make yours, too?

    Who doesn't smile when they see a picture of a beautiful, chubby baby? It's pure innocence, right there. In person, you can see heaven in her eyes.

    Friday, June 09, 2006

    If You're Evil, Like Me, You Already Know How This Ends...

    When Dave found out he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided he needed a woman to enjoy it with. So one evening he went to a singles bar where he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary man," he said as he walked up to her, "but in just a week or two, my father will die and I'll inherit 20 million dollars." Impressed, the woman went home with him that evening and three days later, she became his stepmother.

    Women are so much smarter than men...

    In other news, my pal Paul (a.k.a. hotshot Hollywood producer, author, and blogger-extraordinaire) has used yet another one of my ideas for his "Words For Your Enjoyment" Friday post. Check out today's idea/topic! The subject alone, not to mention his spin on it, will have you laughing your head off! Where the hell do I come up with ideas like this? Heh...

    Thursday, June 08, 2006



    Monikazmommy sent this to me yesterday and I couldn't help but laugh my head off. I figured it was worthy enough to post, so enjoy it and pass it along to people you want to make smile! Heh...

    Well, it's shit ... that's right, shit!
    Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.

    You can get shit-faced, be shit-out-of-luck, or have shit for brains.

    With a little effort, you can get your shit together, find a place for your
    shit, or be asked to shit or get off the pot.

    You can smoke shit, buy shit, sell shit, lose shit, find shit, forget shit,
    and tell others to eat shit.

    Some people know their shit, while others can't tell the difference
    between shit and shineola.

    There are lucky shits, dumb shits, and crazy shits. There is bull shit,
    horse shit, and chicken shit.

    You can throw shit, sling shit, catch shit, shoot the shit, or duck when
    the shit hits the fan.

    You can give a shit or serve shit on a shingle.

    You can find yourself in deep shit or be happier than a pig in shit.

    Some days are colder than shit, some days are hotter than shit,
    and some days are just plain shitty.

    Some music sounds like shit, things can look like shit, and there are times
    when you feel like shit.

    You can have too much shit, not enough shit, the right shit, the wrong shit
    or a lot of weird shit.

    You can carry shit, have a mountain of shit, or find yourself up shit's creek
    without a paddle.

    Sometimes everything you touch turns to shit and other times you fall in a
    bucket of shit and come out smelling like a rose.

    When you stop to consider all the facts, it's the basic building block of
    the English language.

    And remember, once you know your shit, you don't need to know anything

    You could pass this along, if you give a shit; or not do so if you don't
    give a shit!

    Well, shit, it's time for me to go. Just wanted you to know that I do give
    a shit and hope you have a nice day without a bunch of shit. However, if you
    happened to catch a load of shit from some shithead...........
    Well, shit happens!!!

    Wednesday, June 07, 2006

    Kissable Cheeks...

    Don't you just want to...

    ...kiss those cheeks right off of Baby Liv's face?
    (I know my Sister , Beans, and Erin do!)

    Tuesday, June 06, 2006

    You Knew I'd Be Posting About This Sometime Soon...

    ...and the time is now.

    Baby Jack is getting his first molars...all four at the same time! The lower left one is through already. And, boy, has he been a bear! I don't blame him, though. Those teeth are a bitch to cut. Yesterday evening was great for all of us. (Insert sarcasm here.)

    He's surviving with Orajel, Tylenol, and Motrin, so he'll be fine as soon as this is over. Yikes! My baby boy is growing up! *Sigh* And I can't wait to give him more foods that he can chew, not just gum to death.

    A world of gastronomic pleasures awaits you, my young Jedi!

    Monday, June 05, 2006

    Baby Jack's First Piece Of Art...

    I like to call this "Purple #1," since it's his very first drawing with a crayon.

    (Okay, I held his hand with the crayon for the straight line in the upper right and the dots in the upper left, but the rest is all by him.)

    My budding nearly sixteen months old...

    *Sniff, sniff, sigh*

    Sunday, June 04, 2006

    Eighty-Seven Years & Seventy-Seven Days Apart In Age...

    Life is all about love...

    These are photos I took yesterday of my Gram and Baby Liv, the oldest and youngest members of our family.

    Saturday, June 03, 2006

    Eight Weeks Old...

    Today, Baby Liv is eight weeks old. She'll actually be two months old in five days. Finally, I'm posting her birth story. It's taken a while, but here it is. Happy eight weeks, my sweet baby girl!

    Baby Liv’s Birth Story…

    It was seven o’clock in the morning on Saturday, April 8, 2006 and I was feeding Baby Jack (my 14-month-old son) breakfast. My husband was getting ready to go to work. It was a normal day, or so I thought. I’d been experiencing hard contractions which I attributed to the normal Braxton-Hicks contractions. I had one more month left to go in my pregnancy and didn’t think anything was odd. Boy, was I wrong.

    I’d gone to the bathroom and noticed that I’d started bleeding…a lot. It wasn’t normal and I knew it. My contractions were getting harder and harder, too. I’d called my sister, who is an ER nurse in Kansas. I’d also called my mother, telling her I thought I was going into labor at that very moment. My sister told me, after my telling her about the fantastic amount of blood I’d seen, to call my doctor and go to the hospital right away. I’d called my doctor and told him what had been happening. He told me to go straight to Labor and Delivery. He would see me there.

    Oh. My. Goodness. I didn’t expect this. I didn’t wake up thinking I’d give birth that day. And I didn’t even have my hospital bag packed yet. I’d been procrastinating. I wasn’t on maternity leave yet, either. It was the first day of my Spring Break from work. I’m a teacher, so I had the next week off. Having a baby that day wasn’t going to be an issue with work, but I didn’t expect to go on maternity leave until the beginning of May. So much was racing through my mind. Meanwhile, my contractions progressed to the point where I couldn’t get up from the ground. I was doubled over in pain. I had no idea what normal labor was because I’d unsuccessfully induced my son’s birth the previous year. I’d been in labor with him for 48 grueling hours before I’d undergone a Cesaerean due to complications. I never knew how a normal labor would begin. I just knew that the bleeding wasn’t normal. My mother immediately got into her car and came over as fast as she could so she could watch my son while my husband and I went to the hospital. Meanwhile, I packed a bag for the hospital and a bag for my son, just in case. I probably shouldn’t have, but I needed to have my ducks in a row. I barely made it to the car, too. I fell down in pain at the garage door and needed my husband’s help to get into the car. I never expected it all to move so quickly.

    I went straight to Labor and Delivery. The attending doctor checked me out. He was a funny guy, too, and tried to set me at ease with humor. They’d placed a fetal monitor on me and given me an ultrasound right there. My internal exam showed that there were no cervical changes. I was experiencing contractions that weren’t productive. Something was wrong inside. Apparently, I’d suffered a placental abruption and there was the beginning of some separation at the site of my last Cesaerean. My placenta had torn from the uterine wall and that’s why I’d had so much blood. They needed to get the baby out…now. I was lucky I didn’t wait any longer at home. The results could’ve been fatal. When the doctor told me I’d be having a baby that day, I wept…hard. I wasn’t ready. I desperately wanted to VBAC, but that wasn’t going to happen. My baby and I were in danger, so I went into surgery immediately. I received a spinal block because they needed a fast-working anesthesia for surgery. I cried the entire time because I never really got to say “goodbye” to my pregnancy. I’d had a wonderful experience carrying her, just like it was with Baby Jack. However, I needed closure and an emergency Cesaerean didn’t give that to me. I wept for our well-beings and I also wept out of fear of the unexpected.

    My mother came to the hospital while my father watched Baby Jack at our house. My father would also continue to watch our son while my husband spent time with me and the new baby at the hospital during our stay. It was a relief for both of us to not have to worry about our son at that time. He was with his pal, his grandfather. My brother also showed up at the hospital and took pictures and videos of our new baby’s first moments. He knew I’d be in recovery and would want to see what I’d missed.

    At 10:35 a.m. on April 8, 2006, I brought a little girl into this world. She was five pounds, five ounces, and eighteen inches long. She was small, but she proved to be quite a fighter. She took to breastfeeding within an hour of her birth and didn’t behave like a preemie at all. They even let her room-in with me during our hospital stay because she fed so well. It was a couple days before we decided on a name for her. That was our biggest dilemma prior to the morning of her birth. We could never agree on a name before she arrived. It became crystal clear, however, once she did. My husband picked out her name, which proved to be better than any other name we knew. She would be called Liv and her middle name would be Addison.

    Baby Liv came early due to complications, but she was perfect from the very start. We are very fortunate. And her 14-month-old big brother, Baby Jack, will never remember life without her. He would have his very own live-in playmate and best friend to share and grow with for all the days.

    Friday, June 02, 2006

    Feeling Productive...

    This morning, while the babies were just put down for their naps (yes, they've been taking naps at the same time lately, for some strange reason), Hubby and I cleaned out our pantry. It was the first time in a very, very long time. Now we have room for stuff that I'm sure we'll wind up cleaning out next year. Heh...

    In fact, he's at the grocery store right now buying said stuff.

    Later on, we'll probably take a walk to the park and maybe the bakery down the street. I don't know what's brought on this sudden change of mood on my behalf. Maybe it's because Hubby is off from work today and I love being with him; maybe it's the Zoloft I'm taking; maybe it's just because it's beautiful and sunny outside. Maybe it's because I hear things are falling apart and going to shit at work and I don't have to be there to experience it. Maybe it's the fact that I haven't gotten a period yet due to exclusive breastfeeding. Maybe there's something in the water we're drinking.

    Or maybe it's because the babies are napping at the same time two days in a row. Hopefully, this is the start of a welcomed trend (the napping and my mood).

    Thursday, June 01, 2006


    One day a Mom was cleaning Junior's room and in the closet she found a
    bondage S&M magazine. This was highly upsetting for her. She hid the
    magazine until his father got home and showed it to him. He looked at
    it and handed it back to her without a word.

    She finally asked him, " Well, what should we do about this?"

    The Dad looked at her and said, "Well, I don't think you should spank him."

    Heh...Now, that's funny.