Comments from the Peanut Gallery

Taking one day at a time...

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  • Tuesday, January 31, 2012

    Happy Bubble...

    How about a nice, big, hot cup of Shut the Fuck Up to go with that big bowl of Bitchy you had this morning? Seriously.

    There must be something in the water because some people are just ridiculously rude lately. And I'm so sick of adults who behave more like children than their own age. WTF is wrong with people? Get over yourself because you're not as important as you think you are. Did you ever want to tell someone that?

    I'm going to go back into my Happy Bubble again. It's safe and relatively sane there.

    Monday, January 30, 2012

    Softly On My Shoulder...

    Yep, that's pretty much how I look at happiness.

    When you least expect to find it, it's right there.

    Sunday, January 29, 2012

    40 Years...

    Today is my 40th birthday and I have learned a lot in forty years. I was going to make a lengthy list of everything I've learned, but decided not to. I know where I've been, how far I've come, and what it has all taught me. I don't need to list it.

    Instead, I realized that my thirties were the best time of my life, so far. My twenties were filled with a lot of fun, heartache, hard work, and therapy. My thirties, however, is when everything came together. I bought a home, lost one beloved dog, gave birth to four amazing children, had a miscarriage, got my Masters degree, endured various degrees of heartache, and honed my skills in my chosen profession. There were a lot of character building moments that I will always cherish because I learned from them. While my twenties were roaring, my thirties were so fulfilling in so many ways. I learned love and loss.

    I don't know what's in store for my forties. I've been dreading turning 40 for the last year. I don't know how this next decade will top the last one, but I'm hoping for amazing moments with the people I love. I'm trying really hard to embrace 40, so I'm talking myself out of my funk. All I know is that I'm growing every day, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

    Halfway to dead? Yeah, maybe so. Halfway into life, you bet. Maybe the next decade will give me moments as good as the ones in my thirties were. If not, I'll always have memories of my thirties to get me through the hard times.

    I don't know what will happen tomorrow or the next day, but I do know that I'm embracing each moment because those are what matter the most. I can't control any of it, but I can control my reaction to whatever happens. That's half the battle.

    I would say that the past 40 years have taught me a lot. Maybe the next decade will be even better. I feel the need to make every minute count because you never know when your time is up. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go hug my kids. Rather than be upset about turning 40, today I'm going to embrace the fact that I'm still here and loved and able to do the things I love with the people I love.

    Saturday, January 28, 2012

    That Face...

    Me and Liv

    I love the perspective of it and Liv's perfectly symmetrical face. What a beauty!

    Friday, January 27, 2012

    Sign Of The Times...

    Oh, to be simplified. I think in my past life, I lived on a purple bus with a lot of people who played guitars and smoked the good shit. It seemed to be so much easier and less chaotic than it is today, especially with regards to technology. If I could live my life again, I'd like to be part of a hippie commune, reading and writing poetry, singing and dancing outside the purple bus I call my home. With a big fatty in my hand. Heh.

    Or maybe I could live with Jack Kerouac and wear nothing but black and recite my poetry on stage to the beat of snapping fingers.

    Now, if today's medical technology and advances also existed back then, it would be magical.

    Why do so many technological advances make life so much more complicated when they're supposed to make life easier? I'm a slave to my email, my iPhone, and this computer I'm typing this on. When I want to put it all down for even just one day, I find it very challenging.

    Gah. It's a sign of the times.

    Thursday, January 26, 2012

    She Just Knows...

    Not long ago, I took a photograph of Java's nose. I posted it as my profile picture on Facebook. Yesterday, I received this very photo, enlarged, framed, and matted, from a very good friend of mine who lives in Florida. She chopped the frame and cut the mats and everything else that has to be done when assembling a framed piece. This piece of beautiful art that hangs in my bedroom was made completely by hand. Her lovely, hardworking hands.

    It was a complete surprise and just happened to be the best part of my day, especially since it was a character building day at work. Thank you from the bottom of my cold, dead, black heart, E. You might be the only one in the world who would know what to do for me for my birthday. My poor husband and family are scrambling for ideas and you're stealing their thunder! Heh. I admit that I am not easy to buy presents for at all. I really don't even know what I want or need. I don't think what I would like is anything tangible at all. What I want most is a feeling that only I can attain on my own; everything else is just appreciated, but it doesn't fill that void (I don't even know if that's an accurate word to describe it).

    I don't know how E knew it would make me happy, but she did. What I needed yesterday was not anything anyone could buy; I needed a boost in my spirit and she came through without being asked to do so. It's not that anyone else couldn't do that; it was just all about the timing of it. It truly made me feel better when I didn't think I could.

    She knows I'm having a hard time turning 40 because she just went through it herself, dragging her feet all the way there like I am now. She knows how much I love my Chocolate Lab. She also knows I love art. And she took a photograph I took and created something so beautiful, all by hand. She didn't buy a frame and slap a picture in it; she MADE the fucking frame and cut the mats for it herself!

    A-fucking-mazing! And that's why I love her. She just gets me.

    Wednesday, January 25, 2012

    The Canvas Of My Life...

    I need a wall I can do something like this on. I love it. I picked it up off of Pinterest and I just keep looking at it. I need a wall I can do something like this on. Now. I love this kind of art because there are so many layers to it. Everything on here is on here for a reason. That's how I look at it. It's kind of like life, in general. We are the canvas of our own lives and what is placed onto it is everything we experience.

    I feel the need to create a canvas of my life that is tangible and the only way I can think of to do it is through art. Maybe a canvas of words and pictures would suit my taste.

    The creative juices are flowing. It's been a long time since I've thrown myself into an art project. Now is as good a time as any. I need to do this.

    Tuesday, January 24, 2012

    Not In The Cards...

    If I didn't have so many responsibilities, I'd be able to afford the luxury of the nervous breakdown I deserve. But, alas, it is not meant to be. So, trudge through it all, I must. Sigh...

    Monday, January 23, 2012


    This is the week I'm dreading because it's the last week I'll be 39. I have been dreading turning 40 since I turned 39. I am not having an easy time with this at all.

    I don't know what it is. It could be that I have four young children and they'll have an "old" Mom now. It could be that I look at turning 40 as being halfway to dead. It could be a combination of the two or much deeper than I can even perceive. Whatever it is, it keeps me crying. A lot. And it's a very difficult feeling to shake, especially since I can't pinpoint why exactly.

    Anybody over 40 says it's no big deal, but it's a big deal to me. It might not be a big deal to you, but it is to me and my feelings should be respected. I don't want to hear any "over the hill" jokes or snarky comments about being an old lady. I don't want to get hurt by it because I'll never let go of that grudge. It's that serious to me.

    Am I going to have a party? No different than any other year, a meal I like and cake at my parents' house on Saturday. Am I taking any delight in being halfway to dead? Absolutely not. Can I stop the inevitable? Not really because the only way to not turn 40 is to die before you do. I don't want that at all. I just want to be comfortable in my own skin...40-year-old skin. Ick.

    I realize that perspective is everything and it's half the battle. However, I just can't help but think that my children get to watch my slow decline and, ultimately, my death. Maybe that's what has me so blue. Hmmm.

    The idea of turning 40 suffocates my spirit. I literally can't breathe when I think about it. In fact, I can't breathe right now as I type this. I'm hoping to find a silver lining and I've spent the last year looking for one. So far, I've come up empty-handed.

    Nobody understands how I feel, so it's of no use to talk about it. I just get that "whatever" look. Getting old is not going to be a picnic. And right now, I just can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. My "dirty thirties" are over. I'm hoping that "the event" won't be the catalyst for my downward spiral.

    Bleh. At least I'm being honest. One more week. Sigh.

    Sunday, January 22, 2012

    A Different Lens...

    Being a Mother allows you to experience the wonders and awe of childhood all over again, but through a different lens. I am grateful for that lens every single day.

    I think of the C.S. Lewis quote above every time I read to my kids.

    Saturday, January 21, 2012

    Great Snow...

    Oh. My. Word. That was a great snowstorm! It took me an hour to get home, crawling all the way there between 5-7mph. Asshats forget how to drive and I almost got hit twice, but I was so glad when I finally made it home.

    When I got home, Jack and Liv were playing outside in the snow with the neighbor's kids. Liv threw snow at Jack and he was done playing. He loves the idea of playing in the snow, but he hates to get wet and cold. Liv knew that.

    We got our new sexy washing machine yesterday morning. I won't even go into the whole story, but it's our second one this week and a much better model. It's so high-tech, smooth, with sparkly lights, and it plays a pretty song. And I can probably fit all four kids INSIDE it at the same time. How's THAT for bathtime?!

    I'm glad it's the weekend. It was a great week, but it's always nice to rest my mind and my body whenever I my jammies.

    Friday, January 20, 2012


    It is sooooooo cold and soooooooo snowy today. Jack is supposed to go on his bowling field trip, but I'm hoping they don't go. They walk to the bowling alley, which is a mile from his school. With it being so bitterly cold out and the amount of snow we're going to get, I hope they reschedule the trip.

    Getting home from work today is going to be a bitch. The heaviest of the snowfall will happen during my drive home. Ugh.

    I just want to get home safely. That's all.

    Thursday, January 19, 2012

    The Kindness Of Mothers...

    Sometimes you have to depend on the kindness of others in order to get by. How do you repay them? What is the right way to show how grateful you are when others step in and take up the slack you can't manage?

    I depend on the kindness of other mothers. I am completely grateful for how they are helping us right now because we couldn't manage it easily without them.

    Our neighbor takes Liv to school every morning and also brings her home. Liv and her daughter are good friends. She offered to take her to school at the beginning of the school year because she knows I work and John has the babies. She also knows that Jack's bus is set to drop him off at the exact same time Liv gets out of school. And since she's taking her own kids to school anyway, she doesn't mind taking Liv, too. She insists it's not a big deal, but it's a huge deal to me. Without her, I could never manage to get to work on time every day and Hubby would have to wake up the girls early just to whisk them off into the car to get Liv to school on time. Believe me, we're very grateful.

    A mother of Liv's classmate has offered to pick her up from her afterschool art class and bring her to her house on Wednesdays. Her daughter is in the same art program Liv is in, so she doesn't think it's a big deal to bring Liv home with her so that I can pick her up from her house. I could never leave work on time and make it to Liv's school in time for her dismissal from her afterschool art program, so this Mom stepped in and offered to let Liv hang out at her house until I can pick her up after work since the school won't let her stay there until I arrive. Again, she may not think it's a big deal, but I do.

    How do I show how thankful we are for what they do? Anything I think of just doesn't seem like it's enough. How do I show that I, too, am a kind mother? What would you do?

    Wednesday, January 18, 2012

    Ignorance Is The Real Tragedy...

    This article really pissed me off last night. I found the sign above to be fitting for how I feel and found it to be much more effective than spewing my hatred for that man all over my lovely blog. The only thing I can say is that it is painfully obvious that Bob Marshall's mother never held him enough when he was a baby. He has some serious issues with women and their choices, coupled with a severe lack of education about children and disabilities.

    He probably should've been an abortion himself. I'm just sayin'.

    Tuesday, January 17, 2012

    What's #5?...

    I don't know if the above has any merit at all, but I absolutely cannot see the number in #5. Can you? I can see all of the other numbers just fine. Weird.

    Monday, January 16, 2012


    I know I posted this picture not too long ago, but it's so fitting to post it again, especially today. If only pitbulls had a pioneer like MLK...

    Sunday, January 15, 2012


    I love Sundays. It's a lazy day for us around here. Sometimes we stay in our jammies; sometimes we don't. Hubby goes grocery shopping and I get to spend time with all the kids. Just us and nothing pressing to do. It's our day to

    We might clean...or not. We might bake...or not. We might do laundry...or not. Some of us might nap...or not. We almost always just relax, hang out, and have fun. It's our day to just be our own little family. As chaotic as it can be at times, Sundays are almost always NOT chaotic because there's no pressure to be somewhere at a certain time, rush to get something done, or jockey for position in the ranks of the household. We just go about our business at a leisurely pace, stopping to embrace the most precious moments life has to offer.

    Sundays are a great way for us to forget about the daily hustle and bustle, yet they prepare us for the chaos of the week ahead by allowing us to forget about it all for just one day. It is the one day of the week that I look forward to the most. It's the day I get to play school with Jack in his room, belt out Princess tunes like "Belle," with Liv, let Leia nap on my chest on the couch, and pretend play with Liesl and her Little People. It is the only day of the week that I don't mind getting up early because I know it means spending the most amazing moments with each of my children individually.

    I need my Sundays.

    Saturday, January 14, 2012

    Clever Answers...

    Imagine giving students a test like this and these were the answers they came up with. Ingenious!

    Q1. In which battle did Napoleon die?
    * His last battle.

    Q2. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?
    * At the bottom of the page.

    Q3. River Ravi flows in which state?
    * Liquid.

    Q4. What is the main reason for divorce?
    * Marriage.

    Q5. What is the main reason for failure?
    * Exams.

    Q6. What can you never eat for breakfast?
    * Lunch & dinner.

    Q7. What looks like half an apple?
    * The other half.

    Q8. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what will it become?
    * It will simply become wet.

    Q9. How can a man go eight days without sleeping?
    * No problem, he sleeps at night.

    Q10. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
    * You will never find an elephant that has only one hand.

    Q11. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in other hand, what would you have?
    * Very large hands.

    Q12. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
    * No time at all, the wall is already built.

    Q13. How can u drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
    * Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack.

    Friday, January 13, 2012


    Last night, I realized that the kids and I have a three-day weekend. I was looking at my dry erase calendar and noticed that we all have Monday off for Martin Luther King, Jr. Day. After a week like I've had, I am more than grateful for the extra day off. It's been a pretty chaotic week at work, so I could use the respite from it all and I rarely ever say that.

    What will I do with my long weekend? That remains to be seen. Relaxing will be a gross understatement. I'm thinking a jammie day filled with baking and cooking would be a great idea. Everyone is happy when they're in comfy clothes and the house smells like love.

    Thursday, January 12, 2012

    What's YOUR Favorite Animal?...

    My mother-in-law sent me this joke and I appreciate it because the kid in it says things that sound like something Liv would say. Heh.

    Our teacher asked what my favorite animal was, and I said, "Fried chicken."

    She said I wasn't funny, but she couldn't have been right, because everyone else laughed.

    My parents told me to always tell the truth. I did. Fried chicken is my favorite animal. I told my dad what happened, and he said my teacher was probably a member of PETA. He said they love animals very much. I do, too. Especially chicken, pork and beef.

    Anyway, my teacher sent me to the principal's office. I told him what happened, and he laughed, too. Then he told me not to do it again.

    The next day in class my teacher asked me what my favorite live animal was.

    I told her it was chicken. She asked me why, so I told her it was because you could make them into fried chicken.

    She sent me back to the principal's office. He laughed, and told me not to do it again. I don't understand. My parents taught me to be honest, but my teacher doesn't like it when I am.

    Today, my teacher asked us to tell her what famous person we admire most. I told her, "Colonel Sanders."

    Guess where I am now...

    Wednesday, January 11, 2012

    What Do You Notice?...

    An analysis of the above picture can tell us a lot about how different people think...

    · For young men, it's a picture of a lady with a nice arse, but only the most observant will notice that she is crossing a street.

    · The really observant will notice that she is wearing a thong.

    · For older men, she appears to be a respectable woman, with a nice arse, on her way to work.

    · The perverts among them will imagine her naked.

    · Wiser men will ponder the presence of mind of the photographer to take the shot in the face of such beauty and be grateful that they shared it with humanity.

    · For half of the women, this is an ordinary woman who should not have left home dressed that way.

    · The other half will think she is a slut, but wonder where she bought that blouse.

    · Older women will imagine the misery that the woman's arse will cause by the time she reaches 50.

    · But only children, the extremely observant, and the celibate will notice that the taxi is being driven by a dog.

    Tuesday, January 10, 2012

    Mostly Uneventful...

    Well, our first day back to school and work went well. I actually woke up before my alarm clock could ring. I don't know how or why that happened, but I'm glad. I didn't want to hear that damned thing anyway.

    Jack and Liv were fine at school. I think they were glad to get back. Liesl and Leia carried on as if nothing had changed and we all weren't home together for two weeks straight. Leia only asked for me about 16 times, as opposed to 600 times on a normal day. So, I guess it was a good day after all.

    And Hubby broke his toe running up the stairs to get the babies when they woke up. Ugh. That was probably the worst part of the day. And I had nothing to do with it. Heh.

    If the first day back was this uneventful (for me and the kids, at least; not for my poor Hubby), I hope it means the rest of the week will go smoothly, as well. Fingers crossed.

    Monday, January 09, 2012

    The Daily Grind...

    Well, it's back to work for me and back to school for Jack and Liv today. Liesl and Leia are back to Toddler Boot Camp with Hubby. It's been a wonderful two weeks off! I'm not looking forward to waking up early, especially since I just learned how to sleep late again. Sigh...

    It's back to the Old Grind, which will feel new again. Within a week, we'll be used to it again and we'll be settled into our new/old routine.

    Today will be a rough one, though. Fingers crossed all will be well.

    Sunday, January 08, 2012

    Sarcasm Somewhat Intended...

    I have many addictions lately.

    Pinterest, Foodgawker, Craftgawker, Words with Friends, MyCityWay Chicago, Find My Friends. All of these are apps on my iPhone.

    I have no idea how I'm going to be able to manage my addictions and go to work at the same time. This week is going to be rough.

    Saturday, January 07, 2012


    Monday is going to come really fast. That's why I need to cherish every moment with the ones I love this weekend. The daily grind is about to rear its ugly head...again.

    That is all. Enjoy your weekend. I'm certainly going to try.

    Friday, January 06, 2012


    Hello, Friday. So we meet again. Come Monday, I'm back at work and the kids are back in school after a wonderful two weeks off together. I can't say it went by fast or slow. We took each day as it came and enjoyed them all. I can't say I'm mentally ready to get back into the daily grind, though. For me, it's a process. I have a lot on my mind right now and going back to work is just something I'm putting on the back burner until I absolutely must face it. There's nothing better than procrastination, which is so not like me at all.

    So, I don't know what I'll do with my day today. I stayed in my jammies all day yesterday, so I probably shouldn't do that again today. Or maybe I will. I haven't figured it out yet. I can say, for sure, that it's pizza night. Something to look forward to, I suppose.

    I wanted to start training my body (and my bowels) to get up at 5am again, but I just haven't had the balls to set the alarm clock. So, I'll just keep sleeping late and wait for Monday to shock the shit out of me. Heh. It never fails; just as I learn how to sleep late again, it's time to wake up early all over again. It figures. Happens every time.

    The way I look at it, I feel like shit mentally and emotionally right now. I might as well enjoy the extra sleep I can get while I can get it. Before I know it, I'll be burning the candle at both ends again.

    Thursday, January 05, 2012

    The Only Constant Is Change...

    Straight and to the point. Is it ever easy?

    Wednesday, January 04, 2012


    Brie is brie. It's good. It's buttery. The best part of it is the rind. You can't mistake brie for anything else. I like the 8oz. wheel of Brie by President. It's amazing stuff. On the right kind of cracker with a small slice of pear and a drizzle of honey, it's a gastronomic orgasm.

    I sent Hubby to the store to get some brie and he said they were all sold out. So, out of the kindness of his heart, he substituted it with President Le Brie Spread, which doubles as a spread and a dip. Let me tell you how I feel about this.

    The replacement product he bought was anything but wonderful. It was not buttery at all. It had the consistency of a thick sour cream/cream cheese mixture. Its flavor was so pungent, so strong that it was offensive. It actually tasted how I would assume a locker room after a high school football game would taste. Just. Plain. Awful. Worst of all, Liv actually likes it. Bleh. She can have it if she wants. If she hadn't liked it, I was going to chuck it out.

    Very rarely do I ever write a review of a product on here unless it really moves me. Well, President Le Brie Spread really moved me to urge you not to buy it. It is nothing like the 8oz. wheel of brie. It's the worst stuff I ever ate.

    I'm on a mission today to get my brie. And no one is going to stop me. That spread ruined my New Year's Day. Never, ever again. Next time, I will let Hubby know that he can never get a substitute for the real thing, even if he thinks it'll make me happy.

    Rule #1: Never try to substitute other inferior products for things like Q-Tips (any other cotton swab is just pointless and a disaster waiting to happen), Tampax tampons (you just can't ever go generic with feminine products, even though Target has a really good brand), and the 8oz. wheel of President Brie (I don't think I need to reiterate that point).

    Lesson learned.

    Tuesday, January 03, 2012


    How's THAT for a New Year's resolution?

    Monday, January 02, 2012

    Food Is Love...

    *Sushi, brie, popcorn shrimp, crackers, peanut butter Cheerios (yes, they make those!)...all the things that were caked in Liesl's hair as she took her shower last night. Mmmmmm...

    *Birthday cake, candy canes, chicken rings from White Castle...a meal for champions like Jack!

    *Leia's almost-two-hour nap did her a world of good yesterday, especially since we had to go to Grandpa's birthday party later in the afternoon. She was as joyful as ever!

    *Even though Liv puked her head off at my Mom's on Saturday, she still ate like a queen all day long yesterday. Quick recuperative powers!

    It looks like we've started the year off on the right food...oops, I meant to write foot. Heh. Spaghetti carbonara is for dinner tonight. My guess is that Jack will probably only eat the bacon as I cook it and I'll be lucky if there's any left over for the recipe. You can never go wrong with bacon if you live in this house. Bacon = Love.

    Sunday, January 01, 2012


    Have a wonderful year, everyone!